As I have moved from school to school, apartment to apartment, changed roommates, changed majors, stayed one place one weekend and another place the next, I have become accustomed to thinking everything is "temporary" at this point in my life. This is a difficult reality for me to accept as I am such a get-it-doner. My college life and working towards my career has been a long process in my eyes. I have had small victories along the that are nothing to snuff at but I sure am ready to get where I am going already.
I am now a statistic and am one of the 80ish% of college grads that move home. While it makes since in my life right now and I know it is "temporary", I do have mixed feelings about it. I think I always knew I would move back home for a bit, mainly to save some money for a while. However, I feel defensive about my current living arrangement and feel the need to explain to people that I know where I am going after this and it's not forever. I have a plan! It's definitely been an adjustment though as I feel the need to know where I am going to be each night of the week, not having the luxury of randomly inviting people over or leaving at a moments notice. I can no longer eat a bowl of cereal for dinner and have that be accepted as a sufficient meal. Not to say that these are all end of the world, terrible changes; all I'm saying is that it will take some getting used to. Overall, it feels natural to be back and like I never left. I'm blessed to have supportive parents who are happy to have me home (I think!).
As I spend time at the school I am student teaching at, I continue to be reminded of my temporary state. I catch myself wondering how I will feel at the end of my 10 week placement and wondering about my next placement and being sad already that I won't get to spend more time with the students I am with now. Everything I do seems to have an expiration date on it, for better or worse. I'm not going to know what to do with myself once I do actually get where I'm going, if that ever happens.
Wow I'm getting a little deep! Sometimes my mind ends up going in circles. Anyone else? No? Ok, great. Goodnight!
